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A lady in a lot of red. Feeling Off. Good-bye ManBun.

Who got kicked off: Ryan and Manbun Mike were sent home at the rose ceremony that was supposed to happen last week. Jean Blanc was sent home on the group date because Becca didn’t believe he was falling for her. Christon and Nick were sent home at the rose ceremony sans cocktail party.

Cocktail Party from Last Week:  Blake asked her how many kids she wants. They talked about kids names.

Becca gave Jordan gold underpants. David came back from the hospital with his face a little beaten up. Becca gave him the rose so he could go home and rest up instead of attending the rose ceremony.

After the rose ceremony, the men got way too excited about Park City, Utah. No one gets that excited about Utah. It’s snowing in Utah. Except maybe David. No bunk beds in Utah. Too soon?

Park City, Utah

One-on-One: Garrett They wandered around the cute downtown. She is infatuated with him I think because he reminds her of home. And she needs to be comforted right now post-engagement-break-up. Garrett and Becca went bobsledding with an Olympic bobsled team of two that got married from their bobsledding days. Becca told Garrett he reminded her of her dad. So there’s that. Garrett reveals he was married at 23 and divorced after two months. Becca’s response, “hmm.” And her mind was like “hit the brakes!” Garrett told her he’s in it and the next person he says “I love you” to he will mean it. So he won her back. She thinks he’s loyal. Granger Smith sang to them at a concert.

Garrett has done nothing exciting to earn this infatuation. Also, don’t want to burst everyone’s bubble, but Garrett was known to have liked inappropriate and insensitive Instagram posts, according to Vanity Fair. Glamour breaks it down post by post with whistle blower Ashley Spivey. Explain yo’self Garrett.

Also, Lincoln has a previous assault case from 2016 hiding behind the curtains. Warner Bros released a statement having denied knowledge of this charge from his background checks prior to the show, according to Vulture. Lincoln was found guilty and was charged with a year in a house of correction. He must attend 3 AA meetings for two years and stay away from the victim to avoid the jail time. Ashley Spivey is tweeting up a storm. Warner Bros should hire Ashley Spivey to do all the background checks from here on out.

Group Date: Jordan, Chris, Blake, Nick, John, Lincoln, Leo, David, Connor, Christon, Jason, Colton, Jean Blanc

Lumberjack central. The men threw on some flannel and work boots and got to work. They chopped wood, climbed trees and sawed logs. The winner of the lumberjack contest was Venmo guy John. We were surprised too. Jean Blanc gave her a perfume titled Miss Becca Blanc and Becca was like naw. Jean Blanc was sent home at the afterparty because Becca wasn’t feeling it and Jean Blanc told her he loved her and she was like are you sure, and he was like I just thought that’s what you wanted to hear, and she was like oh heeeck no and sent him home. Then she went back to the boys upset and told them she wanted honesty.

One-on-One Date: Wills got the lucky one-on-one date right after she sent Jean Blanc home, and started to feel all the feelings she felt when Arie told her he loved her and was like psyche jk, check out these cameras. Wills turned it around, though, and they had a great time in the snow. It took awhile for Becca to warm up and she said she felt off, but it worked out. Wills had actual relationship problems. Not to say Becca didn’t, but she had a 6 week relationship with a guy who was dating 25 other ladies at the same time and Wills had a 3 year-long relationship and talked about marriage and the lady he was with cheated on him. No comparison. Wills wins this round.

No Cocktail Party and a Rose Ceremony.

ABC’s NEW Show The Proposal

The Proposal is as bad as you think it is. So don’t worry, I will watch it for you and recap it every week. Neil Lane is helping out with rings on this show too.

The Premise: Get married in an hour.

Round One: Gowns and intro videos of 10 ladies.

Round Two: 7 ladies left. Swimwear and spill your heart out to a pod. Oh, did I not mention that the man you are supposedly going to marry is sitting in a thing designed where you can’t see him, but he can see you and it is called a pod. Also, one contestant brought a scrapbook. #longlivethescrapbook

Round Three: 4 ladies left. Gowns back on. Best friend of pod man asks questions and makes a recommendation.

Round Four: 3 ladies left. Lightening fast, timed-deal-breaker questions.

Round Five: 2 ladies left. Pod man is revealed! He walks out and greets the ladies. Then the ladies go backstage to practice their last words to him. They come back out and say their words. Then he pauses and picks one to propose to. And that’s it.

Premiere Episode Full Recap: The premiere episode a man kicked it off. ABC blurred him out of his about video so it’s this mystical blob. It is so strange. He is in a pod designed so he can see everyone but no one can see him. Women are backstage until the host announces, I propose we get started. I propose we don’t continue to use I propose puns. The ladies come out one-by-one in formal wear with their about bios playing on a TV screen. They blow kisses to the pod and their would-be suitor.

The first round he chooses 7 out of 10 to move forward. The second round the ladies are forced to put on swimwear like a Miss America pageant contest and then SPILL THEIR GUTS to the pod. The pod man eliminates 3 ladies so they are down to 4. The next round they return back to their original dresses so as not to confuse the pod man and it’s a round of questions, only this time from the pod man’s best friend. The best friend asked questions because who really knows what the one right question to ask a potential life partner would be. After that the friend goes behind the pod to make a recommendation.

The pod man eliminates one lady so we’re down to three ladies. The fourth round is lightening, deal-breaker question round, where pod man asks each girl ONE personal question. The pod man this time had had his right leg amputated from the knee down and that was one of his questions if the girl could be ok with that. Another question was directed at one of the lady’s sex life. And another led to the discovery that she had also been in a life-threatening car crash similar to him (she didn’t know that)  (spoiler alert: this is the girl he chose). I’m curious how they cast these people for the pod people.

For the final two, they reveal the pod man. Open the pod, less like Superman more like Jurrasic World. And the contestants hold their breath. And breathe a sigh of relief. Then the two have to give pod man a final speech and he chooses who he wants to propose to. Mike and Monica.

Of the contestants from last week:

I need to know who Morgan from Long Island is what brand she is ambassadoring.

Kelly Gray is determined to break her ankle in roller derby skates down what must have been a million stairs. And took her like a million years to get down on top toe what producer allowed this?

Alona had the unfortunate pun on her name of tired of being alone-uh. ugh my heart.

Who goes home broken hearted after never having seen the guy who is supposed to propose to you?

Sooooo Back to Ashley I. and Jared. Because theirs is a love story that I love watching. We’re just gonna cut to Ashley I and Jared for forever.

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