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A broken finger, a broken heart, a trip to the ER, an ex-girlfriend, and some themed-outfits. It must be Bachelorette night.

Who got kicked off: The ones in red X’s were sent home. Turns out the 3rd week of knowing someone who’s dating 24 other men is too soon to let them know you’re falling in love with them. Who woulda thunk it.

Bachelor-Board_Des_week3

Group date: Des took the group on a competitive date. The boys were introduced to a stone-faced squad in black with National Dodgeball emblazoned across their shirts. In the words of Michael G., “It felt like a scene out of the A-Team.”

I like seeing guys in their natural state and seeing guys compete and fight for what they want. – Des

The guns on Des’ bachelors were no match for the National Dodgeball team. Holy smokes I’ve never seen grown men throw a dodgeball so fast or wear cheer shorts so tight before.

“Balls going all over the place, flying around.” – Mikey T. Yes, Mikey, yes they were.

Credit: ABC.com

Taking the phrase “love is a battlefield” to a whole new level, the men walked out in the most amazing ensembles ever for a face-off for more time with Des. The blue team won the first match up. Not to be outdone, the red team came back and chalked up a win. But the blue team came back to seal the deal: 2 out of 3. Des surprised them by taking both teams to the afterparty sans Brooks. Brooks broke his finger during the game and had to be taken to the ER.

At the afterparty, Brad revealed he is also a single dad to his 3-year-old son Maddox. After talking with Des in an interview with ABC, Brad said he thought he really opened up. I’m sensing a theme this season – a lot of opening up and sharing your story.

Cutest moment: Chris took Des to the rooftop and told her he had watched her interact with professional dodgeball coach and the way she coached the teams. Kind of adorable that he’s paying attention. He got the rose, which meant a private concert, slow-dancing, and smooching.

One-on-one: Kasey, aka annoying hashtag man from night one, had a one-on-one date, but not before Des had a stand-off with the man with a girlfriend.

That’s right. Not here for the right reasons: Brian. He admitted to having sex with his ex-girlfriend two days before coming on the show! Yeaaah, you gotsta go. Fun fact: he’s the one who told Des he ended his relationship 2 months before the show. (See last week’s recap.)

Sidenote: Zak’s facial expression when Chris Harrison escorted Brian’s girlfriend through the mansion was hilarious. He has a good shocked face. (See night one’s pics.)

Man, the quickest way to ignite a female bond is throw a lying, cheating man in the mix. So much girl power going on. Des gave Brian’s girlfriend a hug and then the crazy ex started tearing into him.

Favorite quote: Brian’s ex (Stephanie) to Brian, “I did throw rocks at you.” Yeah, so she might not be all that sane either.

Okay, I fully regret my comment last week of mixing up Chris and Brian. All straightened out now. Brian: lying, cheating girlfriend man. Chris: front-runner. Watch out, Bachelor fans. I think he makes it pretty far.

One-on-one: Kasey. So kudos to Kasey for trying to make this date fun, but let’s be real, he got screwed. First, Des makes him bandeloop. What-the-what is that you ask? My thoughts exactly. Apparently, it’s dance on the side of the building in a harness. Not fun. Then for dinner they were practically blown away by a huge gust of wind. After realizing that yeah it’s not warmer in the pool, they sought shelter indoors. Huddled in the stairwell, she gave him a rose.

Group date: YES, keep those themed dates coming, especially if they require a cowboy hat and jeans. I think every date should require a themed ensemble. The boys arrived in stagecoach to find Des on a balcony, kicking butt after an actor pretended to grab her and she threw him over the balcony.

“It was pretty intense and hot at the same time” – Zak referencing Des’ kickass moves.

Credit: ABC.com

The stunt team from the new Disney movie The Lone Ranger gave the boys a few lessons in cowboy boot camp. They learned how to “lasso, quick draw their pistols, and fight for justice.” Taking all of those skills, they went on a rescue mission for Des.

Dan’s plants split. Yep, right down the middle as he was climbing onto his horse. Bless his heart. He powered through, but it was all for naught. No extra time with Des and on top of that no rose this week.

Juan Pablo and his sexy, suave Spanish accent won Des’ heart and they got to watch a sneak preview of The Lone Ranger and share their first kiss.

Bryden: Des said she has to lead him a little bit, but once she does he just takes it away. I’m referring to the making out. I think Bryden makes it pretty far. I hope he doesn’t win, because he’s stealing my heart.

Zak: He pointed out he made a move to kiss Des during the rescue mission and they shared a laugh. Des: “I got confused.” He also let her know he thought her genuine and that she has everyone in the house falling in love with her.

James: Des describes him as a big, strong man with such a loving, caring heart. His dad was sick back home and so he wanted to know if there was something there that validated him staying. She reassured him by giving him the rose.

Des: James, will you accept my rose?
James: But only if you accept my daisy. (as he hands her a hand-picked daisy)
Des: You just took it?
James: Yeah, hopefully I don’t get in trouble.

Pool Party! Des opted to have a pool party instead of a cocktail party that night. Such. A. Good. Idea. At one point they were all crammed in the hot tub together. I repeat. Such a good idea.

Ben caused more drama with the other men after he stole her for a quick spin around the block before she officially arrived at the pool party. The men saw her pull up with him and he lied about spending time with her.

The L-bomb! I think Brandon wins for dropping the L-bomb the fastest in Bachelor history. He verbatim told Des, “I’m falling in love with you.” Too soon! Too soon! Poor guy. Des told him the chemistry just wasn’t there. I don’t care who you are, you don’t drop the L-bomb 3 weeks in when you’ve seen the person all of three times WITH OTHER DUDES around. You hold those feelings in. You just keep those feelings bottled up safe inside, tucked away until it is safe to say it. And if you have to tell someone because you might burst, you tell the interviewers, the plant, the rock, your journal. NOT the girl.

Extras: If you watch one thing during this episode, watch the cowboy clip at the end where Zak teaches Juan Pablo to have a Southern twang. “There’a a snake in my boots. My horse needs a drink of water.” Pretty epic.

Next week the bunch is headed to Atlantic City for a Mister America competition. Oh yes, there appears to be heel-wearing, ribbon twirling, not-to-miss acts.