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Disclaimer: A lot of wine was consumed while watching this episode. Because that is extremely necessary for viewing Women Tell All, the worst episode of the season. So I cannot be held completely responsible for what is to follow.

Women Tell All

 

 Finally, it’s Chris Harrison’s time to shine! Is it just me or is he getting less and less air time? Anyway, this is Chris Harrison’s moment. See how many tears he can stir up.

The biggest news is Lace is going to be on Bachelor in Paradise! Yes! We all knew she wanted to do it deep, deep down in her soul and now it looks like her therapist is giving her the green light. Lessgo!

 

 The biggest winner of the night was Sheila obviously. In case you need a reminder Sheila is the chicken handler enthusiast’s chicken. She tried to make a run for it at one point, but Lace got ahold of her. So close. I feel you, Sheila. I raise my glass to you.

 

 A close second though is the man who tattooed Lace’s face onto his side. Some might argue he should be the winner. I think you should think about that for a moment. More on that later.

I continue. We took a typical walk down memory lane with a montage recap of the entire season and each of the ladies who caused the most drama. It was lovely. I didn’t need the reminder.

Leah. The audience is obviously #TeamLaurenB when it comes to Leah. The studio audience booed in Chris Harrison’s reference to her throwing Lauren B. under the bus back before Leah was sent home immediately.

Hot Seat Participants

Jubilee

First on the hot seat was Jubilee. She got some heat by Amber and Jamie about some comment she made about being the first black girl to make it the farthest. I didn’t take offense to it. You do you, Jubilee.

Quote of the night: This happened during self-reflection time with Chris Harrison. “I refuse to overthink things so much to the point that I’m self-destructive,” said Jubilee. Jubilee is amazing. she just got promoted to sergeant and she plays the cello and she’s just neat.

Lace

Chris Harrison led her down the road to the question of if she was going to return for Bachelor in Paradise. Lace had successfully dodged this question on a previous After the Rose talk. Some dude got a tattoo of her face on the side of his body. But really. Her face. Tattoo. His body. And it’s not in a discreet place either. It’s right there on his side. As soon as he lifts up his arms to take off his shirt to go diving into the water, there it is.

Olivia

Everybody’s still hating on Olivia. And rightfully so. I think Olivia is still into herself. She did say, though, that she was a victim of bullying when she was younger and now on social media. I felt bad for her. But hey, maybe she can be the spokesgirl for an anti-bullying campaign and make some dough in sponsorships. Cheer up, love. She said she gave her sister her social media accounts and immediately I was like that’s why they were so funny in response to the #OliviasMouth comments and a couple other tweets. Olivia apologized to Amanda for the insensitive teen mom comment. Amanda in her loving motherly way accepted her apology wholeheartedly.

Caila

Caila talked about her rejection with Ben and told us that she watched the season. Whhhyy would you put yourself through that? To find out that he said I love you to two other ladies when you were the runner up. Eesh. That’s not fun. Caila told Chris Harrison, “I want someone to look at me that way they can’t control how much they love me.”

Chris Harrison keeping it real. Bringing it back. But you wanted that to be Ben. No duh. Thanks, Chris. He may have well said, “Give me tears!” Ask and you shall receive. There were tears everywhere tonight. Caila, Olivia, Jubilee. Ben? No, not Ben. But I’m sure if Lauren B.’s name had been brought up he would have started the waterworks. I don’t know who wins. I haven’t looked at the spoilers. I have looked at our polls on here and Lauren B. seems to be pulling ahead, but not by much.

Next on the hot seat! Ben! Ben Ben Ben! Bring ‘em out. Bring ‘em out.

 

 “I hope you know how much our relationship meant to me,” he said to Caila.

“I don’t think ours stalled I think others were progressing” Ben to Caila. Ever the politician.

I’m not blaming you for our relationship and addressed the entire group of ladies. It’s my fault just as much as it is yours. Still trying to make everyone happy. Good ol’ Ben. Chill Becca was like it’s nice to know there are still guys like you out there. She’s still one of my faves. San Diego forever sistah. (The wine I swear.)

Chris Harrison pop quizzed Ben on which twin was which. Ben passed with flying colors but there were definite nerves.

Ben says he’s so in love, saying, “I would marry that woman tomorrow if I could.”

Chris Harrison jumped at that opportunity and challenged Ben to it.

Bloopers

Chris Harrison announces it as though he knows that that is the moment everyone tunes back in to bump up the ratings. That that is what the people want. It’s true! Give the people what they want!

My favorite clip was of Becca and JoJo lifting weights in what looked like a hotel room in their plush white hotel robes. The weights may have been 1lb maybe. They had their champagne glasses in the other and they lifted the weights first. Becca counted, “One, two, three, sip. You’ve earned it.”

Lots of bugs everywhere scenes.

Preview of what is to come TONIGHT. Ben definitely says I love you to both ladies. MULTIPLE TIMES. It’s as if he can’t stop his tongue from forming the words once they’ve been said. They just keep coming. I love you. I’m in love you. I definitely love you.

Best line of the night: In order to fully love one woman I have to say good-bye to the other.

Because that’s how much I love her

There was a scene where you can’t see who is talking but it’s definitely Ben and JoJo and Ben tells JoJo in the bathroom that he’s in love with the Lauren B. too. The previews seem to indicate that Lauren B. figured out he was in love with JoJo too awhile ago.

Tonight cannot come soon enough!! What are you doing for your bachelor watch parties?! I need to know. Keep a lookout for a sweet giveaway I’m doing TONIGHT!

 

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