Tags

, , , , , , , , , , ,

Screen shot 2014-05-23 at 8.51.11 PM

Season premiere of The Bachelorette is here! As are the awkward entrances and limos upon limos of men to oggle. No horses or helicopters, or wheeling pianos this time, but rest assured the awkward entrances are still coming in strong! And for your re-living pleasure, I have organized them below.

Who got kicked off: Not that you’re going to remember them after tonight’s episode, because there are just too many men, but gone are Anal Emil, Josh B., Mike, Rudie the Attorney, and Steven.

Bachelorette-Board_Andi

Personal trainer Cody came in pushing the limo. Like actually pushing the limo up the driveway. Craig came in popping bottles. Patrick the ad exec came in with a soccer ball. (As you’ll remember Andi was a dab hand at soccer.) Pro golfer Nick S. rode in on a golf cart. And Marcus came in looking like Ryan Gosling.

Screen shot 2014-05-23 at 8.48.08 PM

 

No, for reals. They are the same person.

 

Best Entrance: Lamp Man is my new favorite person. And yes, he will now be known as Lamp Man from here on out. His real name is Brett and he is a hairstylist. I’m a fan of his humor. When he exited the limo, he brought out a lamp. And not just any lamp. A standing lamp. From the hotel.
His introduction: “My mother always told me never greet a lady empty-handed.”
Andi’s response: “Did you take that from the hotel?”
Brett’s matter of fact response without hesitation: “Yeah.”
Andi: “Yeah, we’re gonna have to return that.”

Screen shot 2014-05-23 at 8.08.18 PM

Sweetest Introduction: The introduction that made the hearts of America sigh goes to Tasos. I personally think it was a little overused, but considering the competition, his was the only really memorable entrance, so I’ll let it slide. Love Lock man Tasos. He recreated the Love Lock bridge in Paris, by locking a lock on one of the trellis’ on the mansion, and then throwing the key into the fountain.
Most Awkward Introduction: Winner of the most awkward introduction goes to…..Emil! That’s pronounced A-mel, if you will. You know how I know this? Because here is how he introduced himself. “Hi, my name is Emil. It’s like anal, but with an M.” Yup. Congrats Emil for managing to work anal into the conversation on the first night. And not only wokring anal into the conversation, but also attaching it to your name so that whenever she says your name she will link it to anal. Well done.Best Bromance: Two men are already finding love on the season night one. While it’s not Andi, this pair is rather entertaining. Patrick and Andrew are having a bromance.  Hailing from California (Newport and Culver City respectively), Patrick and Andrew really hit it off. Are they dating each other? What is going on. They just really bonded. Do you want us to leave you two alone? If they don’t find love with Andi, looks like they will leave with the cliched finding of friends. It really can happen on The Bachelorette.Party Crasher: What! Chris Bukowski is back with roses in hand!! Chris, if you’ll remember was from Emily’s season of The Bachelorette and also had his hand in The Bachelor Pad. I’m not a big fan. I personally think he was doing this to advance his career or put himself back on the map. Kudos to Andi for not taking him back on the show.Coolest Profession: JJ from San Francisco is a Pantstrapreneur. I haven’t done extensive research into this, but it sounds fancy.

First Impression Rose: The man who received the first impression rose was polka-dotted tie wearing, software sales man, that can really wear a suit, Nick V. Andi revealed in an interview that he wasn’t the typical man she went for, but found something intriguing about him when they had a little one-on-one time.

Quote of the Night: Pro golfer Nick S. rode up on his golf cart. After explaining the reasoning behind his chariot to Andi, she responded with a glint in her eye and, “I’ve got a little swing.” Nick S. was obviously taken aback. Andi: 1. Nick S.: 0.

Eric the Explorer: It’s heartcrushing to watch Eric Hill on the show. I’m glad they didn’t edit him out of the show, but it’s sad to watch knowing how quickly his life was taken. The very attractive and well-traveled Eric was killed suddenly in a paragliding accident prior to the airing of the show. He had finished filming with The Bachelorette, and had returned to his world tour when he got in an accident. The 31-year-old had set out to visit every country in the world, where he would have to experience both the culture (human element of the trip) and an exciting activity of that country (the adventure element). He documented his travels on a blog dubbed “The Global Odyssey,” as well as on Instagram. Upon his passing, Eric has inspired a new movement called the #LiveLikeEric foundation, which aims to promote philanthropy and cultural awareness and live in such an open, vibrant, and inspiring way as Eric did.

For his introduction on The Bachelorette, he brought two handmade dolls for Andi. He had gotten them in Peru in the Andes mountains. The people he had gotten them from told him to give them to his girlfriend. He didn’t have one at the time, so he brought them for Andi. At the start of the show, ABC did a tribute to Eric and dedicated the season to his memory.

Who are your favorites so far?

*I realize I’m a week behind. But I’ll be back in action next week with polls galore. Don’t you fret.

Advertisements