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A compilation of flashbacks to shirtless men hanging around the house, a slew of Bachelor in Paradise commercials (they are really pushing this one), and the lie detector test results we all desperately wanted to know kicked off The Men Tell All episode.

Credit: Zap2it.com

Credit: Zap2it.com

The show started with all of the men wearing scarves, playing off the unintentional theme of the season. After that they cut to a recap of the season, and showed the mens’ reactions to all of the comments.

What-the-What of the Night:

You thought they had done it all. A live break up. A live switcheroo (ahem Jason and Molly Mesnick). But you know what we haven’t done? A live ultrasound. I feel as though a picture would have sufficed, or some other way to announce the sex of the baby like colored balloons being freed into the studio audience, or a big sign unveiled with pink or blue confetti, or a giant cake that Chris Harrison pops out of with the test results. But no. Let’s bring in an ultrasound technician and put some goop on her belly. To catch you up to speed, JP and Ashley (one of my favorite couples and one of the few Bachelor/ette success stories) are pregnant! They didn’t know if it was a boy or a girl and agreed to find out with the rest of America on The Men Tell All. ABC put the ultrasound on the big screen and Chris harrison’s face popped up. The chuckles were followed by a dramatic pause, and the technician announced they would be having a boy! #Wehadababyitsaboy

A good majority of the episode was stirring up trouble and addressing the racist remarks Andrew was accused of muttering at one of the earlier rose ceremonies.

Hot Seat Participants:

Each of the following men had some quality one-on-one time with Chris Harrison on the hot seat. As they took their seated position on the couch across from Chris, a reel of their time on The Bachelorette played on the screen, sprinkled with Andi’s commentary mostly about their good looks and sweet characters.

Marquel

marquelMarquel’s flashback reel included snapshots of his ridiculously chiseled frame and his first night on the show where he brought a platter of cookies and had Andi sample each one (especially the black and white cookie – I see what you did there), which is how he earned his nickname of “The Cookie Monster.” As always, Marquel was looking dapper last night, sporting brightly colored pants, a patterned shirt and socks, and a chocolate chip cookie pinned to his lapel to complete the look. He talked to Chris Harrison about his descent into the friend zone, and made a cute joke about how he missed the memo that all of the other men in the house had started to kiss Andi. Now before you start bemoaning his quick departure from Andi’s season, you should know that sweet Marquel will be just fine and picking back up on Bachelor in Paradise. And finally, in Marquel fashion, he brought a basket of black and white cookies to throw into the audience. He’s adorbs.

Marcus

As per usual, he didn’t have much to say. Or I tuned out. Either way, I doubt there was much to take away from this interaction. There is one interesting tidbit of information you will learn about Marcus later, though. Keep reading to find out. And never fear, you’ll get to see more of Marcus on Bachelor in Paradise, along with personal trainer Cody.

Chris and Marcus before the show. Credit: Marcus Grodd's Twitter

Chris and Marcus before the show. Credit: Marcus Grodd’s Twitter

Chris

As farmer Chris was talking to host Chris, some dark-haired, tanned girl in a cream-colored romper raised her hand. Yes, you heard correctly. Literally raised her hand to be called on. JJ exchanged an amused look with Marquel. The hand-raising worked. They called her down onto the stage to talk to Chris. The Chris-es had been discussing how difficult it was to date in a small town and what Chris planned on doing next for his love life. The dark beauty said she related to his struggles, having come from a small town in Canada, and expressed interest in dating him. Chris Harrison happily facilitated a speed date during the commercial break.

Lie Detector Test Results!

Finally they brought out Andi (looking gorgeous as ever) to face all of her exes, and Chris Harrison had a surprise in store. Low and behold, he had the test results Andi ripped up in Italy! He read them to the studio audience. Brian, JJ, and Farmer Chris were the ones who were lie-free. Marcus, Dylan, and Josh on the other hand have some ‘splaining to do.

Marcus told one lie: he has slept with fewer than 20 women.

Dylan told two lies: he prefers brunettes and is ready for marriage. (Dylan’s response to the results: “This sucks.”)

And Josh told one lie. Chris gave Andi the option to know or not know Josh’s lie, but told her if Josh was one of his final two this particular lie would be one he would want to know. That’s just mean, Chris Harrison. Brian and Dylan told her not to do it, and she heeded their advice, choosing to continue to remain in the dark.

Bloopers

Andi had her very own blooper reel. There was someone flushing the toilet as she was talking in one of her interviews. There was Andi taking her nosespray, telling them not to put it on the bloopers. There was the camera crew wrecking Nick’s house. And of course, Brian’s fear of pickles.

So to recap.
The Bachelorette Finale: Monday, July 28 at 8|7c
Bachelor in Paradise Premiere: Monday, August 4 at 8|7c
Coach Brian’s still afraid of pickles.
And Nick made a storybook.
Vote! Who do you think Andi chooses?
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