Sisters, A Hallmark Lady in a Red Pick-Up Truck, A Boat, Go Carts, Blurred Canadian Flag

The Bachelor is back. Joey moved back to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania from Hawaii. We met his sister and family. His sister looks like she could be on the show. And she’s hilarious. Joey’s sister Carly said it’s going to be cringey watching Joey kiss all these ladies. Joey has 32 ladies, the most of any Bachelor season. Clayton’s season had 31.

Who got kicked off: Chandler, Kayla, Kyra, Lanie, Nat, Sam, Samantha, Sandra, Talyah, and Zoe went home night one.

First Impressions:

Maria came out of the limos waving a Canadian flag that the producers blurred out. Odd.

Kelsey A. from New Orleans brought a voodoo doll of Joey with a little tennis racket. She told him she hoped it wasn’t that creepy and gave it a little kiss on the cheek. Her mom passed away a couple years ago.

Daisy is literally from a Hallmark movie. Ok, not literally, but she grew up on a Christmas tree farm, her name is Daisy, she has a cochlear implant and she rode in on a red pick-up truck – a Hallmark staple. Tell me I’m wrong. Also, she is utterly delightful. Joey seems to be taken by her too.

Lexi likes sports, particularly golf. In her one-on-one chat with Joey she told him she was born in Toronto, went to Ohio State (Go Buckeyes!) and got Joey a ball marker for golf. Lexi plays golf in Hilton Head with her family – her, her dad and her brother. She told Joey he could complete their foursome. (Also, I think her voice sounds like a previous Bachelor contestant and Erin Andrews.)

Jenn raced over in a go-cart. She did a donut. It was cute. She gave up physician assistant school in Florida to come date Joey.

Daisy, Lexi, Jenn and Kelsey A. are my top four picks because they seem fun and delightful.

Lea was a pick from After the Final Rose when Joey was announced as Bachelor. She was given a card by producers. She arrived with her card (that is not a date card), and she told Joey to come find her to open it together.

Then she opened it on her own and cried because she didn’t feel good about it. The card allowed her to steal any One-on-One before Hometowns. Lea immediately looked sad. Lea said she believed she got this card for a reason and said she did not like that it came at the expense of another. Also, again Joey was so adorable about this. After Lea went up to Joey and had him read the card, he grinned and said, “What are your thoughts on that?” Lea told him she just wanted to give a lot of autonomy to him. It was super mature. Lea told Joey that it didn’t feel right because it was his journey and no amount of superficial cards or one-ups was going to make a difference. She told Joey, “If I’m not Joey’s person at the end of this, and if I am I am. But it’s not gonna matter whether or not I get a little card or not.” Joey loved that character trait about Lea and gave her the First Impression Rose. Sweet.

First Impression Rose: Lea

Lea burned the card in the fire in front of the ladies.

Katelyn is a nuclear radio chemist. She had Joey put on goggles. Joey responded, “I’m guessing that’s a safe bet.” Cute. And then she had him do the elementary volcano science fair project of pouring a liquid into another and having it bubble up and pour over. She announced they indeed had chemistry.

Jess came in on a boat. She lives in San Diego, but she’s from Tennessee. Also, she got the first kiss that we saw and announced it to all the ladies. Yikes.

Taylah brought a “Save the Date” card. Nopers. She went home.

Lauren the older sister had Joey shotgun a beer with her.

Kelsey T. is an actress.

Samantha is a professional football cheerleader.

Edwina fed him food she made.

Taylor brought a massive bra and said she was here for the massive support. Meh. Joey was adorable and genuinely surprised by it.

Evalin came in on a Tennis Umpire’s chair. Joey, along with the rest of America, thought it was a lifeguard tower.

Kyra yelled at him.

Joey is such a sweetheart. After Kyra did a weird shout intro, Joey said, “That’s – you got that,” head nodding.

Zoe had a weird one and came in with different-sized bananas on a silver platter and asked Joey to pick one. Awko taco. Bringing that back. Does anyone remember Awko Taco of Bachelors past?

Kayla made orgasmic sounds in the limo and claimed they were tennis grunts. So odd.

Madina knocked a bunch of tennis balls out of the limo and Joey said, “Looks like you dropped something.” Madina replied, “It took me a lot of balls to be here.”

Also, fun fact: Joey can juggle.

Sister Sister

Allison is the younger sister of Lauren who signed them up for the show. They are both from Philly. Lauren and Allison each met with Joey separately and then together told him they were sisters. Joey was like is it weird I already pieced that together because your stories were similar.

Rose Ceremony

Joey sent home 10 ladies night one. So we’re down to 22 ladies for week 2.

Previews show Joey having strong feels for Kelsey A., falling for Jenn on a beach, and travel and a drone-formed rose in the sky. Break out the bubbly. We’re back!